This is what it is. Breastfeeding and I are in a love hate relationship. I know it is the healthiest option for my children. I know it’s hard and you have to be committed. I love the bond it creates.
I breastfed Mia for 4 months, Sadie for 1, and I was bound and determined to make it 1 year with Wit. We made it 5 months and 1 week.
I still have 2 months worth of frozen milk in the freezer so I guess technically I guess you can say 7.
It started out great with Wit, but when his episode happened my supply went down by 50% and I spent the next week day and night building it up. Then Mia got the world’s worst stomach flu loosing 6 pounds in 3 days, and I was so stressed trying to take care of her, keep Wit away from her, and myself healthy because I knew the bug would dry me up for sure, and I was Wit’s only food source since his episode, that my supply went back down while his appetite when up. I was nursing around the clock to try and satisfy him, but he was nursing every 2 hours through the night at 3.5 months still and I was worn out.
I made an appointment with my pediatrician to find something to supplement him with. Since we knew his anaphylactic reaction was due to milk, we tried Soy. Epi out and ready to go, I gave him an ounce slowly in the office. Everything went great and I used the soy formula at night. Drew gave him a bottle and I slept.
Wit decided he liked the bottle so much that over the next few weeks he wanted to actually nurse less and less. He would scream bloody murder when I tried to nurse him until I gave him the bottle.
So began my life with the Medela pump. I was not ready to give up yet so I pumped after I fed him to have milk for the next feeding.
Then about a week ago he decided no more nursing! Not even in the early morning or late at night. I was so sad. I had been through it with this kid and I was not ready to quit!
But, after a few days I pumped less and less.
We had a good run.
It was full of drama, but I know I gave him the best of me for 5 months.
Maybe if there is a #4 we will finally master it.